I read this thing on my phone yesterday morning at work.
“Thanks be to God for his inexpressible gift!”
I got to thinking, what is the gift?
Maybe it’s salvation. Maybe it’s, conveniently, thanksgiving. I’m of the opinion that it’s prayer. Even when those prayers start and end with, “Lord, I thank you for today, though I’m not really thankful.”
Maybe the gift, in this context, is the death of Jesus, his life, and resurrection. Maybe its those whom He places in your life to love you forever.
I talked to my mom, and my dad, and my sister this morning. And it occurred to me:
This gift, possibly, comes in the form of those who require no explanation from me. They do not require justification from me nor do they decide, who I am.
There are those in your life, too, who will come and decide who they think you are or ask for your explanation of who it is you think you are. And in the midst of these carnivorous creatures I do believe that the Lord is there, waiting. He is waiting for you, but I am more or so excited to say, He is waiting for me. He waits for me to sit on his knee, all the fleshy parts of me, with my phone in one hand and my nail file in the other. He waits for me.
I want to tell you what He does not wait for. Explanation. Maybe this, is the gift. Because the walk of a believer is not black and white and it will not fit into a box. It is not ministry. It is not being a happy giver. It is messy and it is gross and it is grey. And I know I do the things I do and the reasons why I do them, and people are never ashamed to say well–it should not be so. It would not be so, if you trusted . If, you prayed. If, you read your Bible.
But he waits for me. Do you understand? It is like so:
“They tell me I must wade into waters, where I will soon drown. Before I march in, I leave this on the shore for you. I pray you find it, sister, so you will know what was in my heart as I went under.”
-Khaled Hosseini, And the Mountains Echoed