I had a dream recently. In the dream I saw the faces of people I used to spend time with. A voice told me that these people hated me, and I wanted to know why.
“For you, life is shiny and new. For them, it will never be that way again.”
I’ve been remembering Arizona lately. I feel like it was just an episode of my life that didn’t mean anything. Sometimes I look at my list of friends on Facebook and I’m like wow, I guess I really didn’t impact anyone.
But the truth is we never really know how or whom we are impacting day-to-day. There’s no way to really measure that.
I feel like I kind of hit the ground running a lot–with new jobs and new friends and new places to live. Indeed it is all shiny and new. But more than that, I have this tendency to tell myself to try and make the best of it.
What is it about being a Christian, you feel the need to try?
You know regardless of if we try to make the best of a situation, there is one who makes a way when there is no way. Lately I kind of feel like He has been nudging me,
“You know it’s not your job to try and make the best of it. It’s my job to make the best of it.”
And I know some may look at that and say well, no. That’s not biblical and that’s pessimistic and somebody didn’t drink their milk this morning.
Only one of those things are true.
It’s funny how after I write a blog, I find myself collecting. There’s this folder in my brain that just collects all week long, little files here and there. Phrases like “shiny and new”. I’ll think about writing until I sit down in front of the computer ready to go, realizing I can’t tune out everything going on around me. And then when it’s time for bed I fight it so much, like a little child. That’s when it all comes out.